Thursday, June 18, 2015

Today I Choose Love

Candice Carre Photography
I started the morning in tears as I reflected on my marriage. Viewing our wedding photos and reflecting on our wedding day. I'll never forget it. I was so nervous that day.  I think I had a panic attack too. Had to pull out my inhaler to help my breathing. (Always been a drama queen) Mostly I was nervous for all those people who would be staring at me as I walked down the aisle. I hate that kind of attention it makes me feel so awkward, like a fish out of water. I wasn't nervous about marrying my hubby. I was so confident and sure that it was one of the best decisions I would ever make in my life. The day was perfect and my friends and family made it a stress free day for me.

Candice Carre Photography
Today is my 4th wedding anniversary and I am filled with so much joy and love. I made a vow to love, honor and cherish my husband regardless of our financial standing or challenges with our health as long as we both shall live. I have remained committed to God and my husband both publicly and privately. I say it in that order because my commitment is to God first and then my husband. I stood before God and committed my life to my husband. Regardless of how I feel  or what we go through I must maintain that commitment. I'm always reminded that it wasn't an emotional decision it was a well thought out decision between two people who cared deeply for one another and weren't afraid to commit before God.

I'll be honest it wasn't until we were married that the seriousness of the commitment I was making really sank in. It's to God who I hold my vow as well as my husband and once I understood that it was easier to honor and respect my husband. I should probably review the vows to remind myself of the promises I made more frequently than I do. I don't take them lightly. I want to live a life fully committed to God and my husband. I want to walk in love towards him always and show kindness even when it would satisfy my emotions and ego to yell and belittle him. I want my sons and daughters to see their mommy and daddy as two crazy lovebirds who honor and respect one another and can't live without each other. I want continue on the path we started it's a tough road sometimes but the rewards of the work we put into our marriage are so worth it. I love when I can encourage other people because we didn't give up and put forth the effort.

It's a great feeling to know that you are giving your all and trying every day to make your marriage better than the day before. We're not perfect that's for sure but we're on a journey together and we're learning. I know we're exactly where we should be and I'm grateful. The adventure continues and I can't wait to see what comes next. Babies that's for sure but in God's time not ours. I love you Gerald Kaye. Thanks for all you do for me and how you love me. I'm glad we get to spend our lives with each other. Thanks for stopping by the blog to read my mushy gushy post. Leave me a comment detailing how you choose love. I'd love to hear from you.


Candice Carre Photography